I got one of those chain e-mails saying that "we" have to take back Christmas! Because all of this "Happy Holidays" business is breaking little 8 pound 6 oz. baby Jesus! Seriously, the e-mail urged it's recipients to send Christmas cards to the ACLU (the people who deliver doom and destruction) in order to backlog their mail room. I'm still not sure what the actual logic was there, but hey, I'm all for wishing the ACLU Happy Holidays. Er, Merry Christmas, I mean.
Dear people who are angry that they are sometimes told to have Happy Holidays when they check out at the local Wal-Mart ... it's not that us non-Christians are trying to keep you down. (Yes, I know that as a majority, it's hard for you.) Instead, you were probably wished Happy Holidays because there's a chance that Christmas isn't the holiday you celebrate. Unless you're wearing a red sweater with Rudolph on it accompanied by a Merry Christmas! broach, it's hard to tell. You could celebrate Hanukkah or Kwanzaa or nothing at all. It's a broad way of saying, "Hey, whatever your winter thing, I hope it's a good one." It's not a disrespect to you or Jesus. It's an attempt to be inclusive.
If you don't like it, try giving the neon sign above your head that reads "Christian" a wack, because maybe we can't see it.
I went to sleep last night after checking up on the election coverage. My main interest? Maine's Prop 1. Maine, a place I've never been and never really felt the need to visit. I imagine it being full of tall trees, fisherman, and small towns. In all of the reading I did yesterday, I learned that it's also the home of one of the largest populations of LGBT individuals per capita on the East Coast. So ... teh gayz? They haz em. Which is partially why it blows my mind that Prop 1 passed, striking down a law that gave same-sex couples the right to marry, just like opposite-sex couples (thank you, Carrie Prejean for that ridiculous phrase) can.
This is one of the ads that was run asking people to vote "Yes on 1".
Ah, the fear factor. They'll teach it to the kids! THE KIDS!
Truth? According the to Maine Attorney General, that wouldn't happen. (Read THIS article if you don't believe me.) I don't recall the class in school where the teacher sat us down and taught us all about marriage and divorce and adultery and everything that goes with it. Who knows, maybe I slept through that bit. But even if kids were taught about gay marriage, well, I don't quite see the problem. No one is going to tell your son or daughter that they HAVE to marry someone of the same sex. I mean, that is the concern, right? That little Johnny or Susie will grow up to be gay? I have my doubts about them "learning" to be gay in school.
And then, we've got my favorite argument ... the Bible. Ah, the Bible. Here are some of the favorites of the homophobic, er, I mean ... same-sex marriage proponents:
Leviticus 18:22 - Thou shalt not lie with a man as one lies with a female. It is an abomination.
Leviticus 20:13 - "If a man lies with a man as one lies with a woman, both of them have done what is detestable. They must be put to death; their blood will be on their own heads."
Those are the quotes that so many Christians use from The Torah. I would write out all of the quotes that Christians believe are no longer valid from The Torah, but I don't think Blogspot allows posts that long.
There's also a verse from (ta-da!) Christian Bible.
1 Corinthians 6:9-10 - "Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God."
Drunkards and slanderers, eh? Shouldn't there be more people out there protesting to bring back prohibition? I mean, it's tainting the moral fibers of our country!
Ok, fine, I'll hand it to them. The Bible, take your pick, does make mention of homosexuality. But, there are also these gems, all from the Christian Bible:
John 13:34 - (Jesus) A new commandment that I give unto you. That you love one another.
John 8:7 - (Jesus) He who is without sin among you, let him cast the first stone. Matthew 5:7 - (Jesus) Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.
Matthew 5:10 - (Jesus) Blessed are those who have been persecuted for righteousness sake. For theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
(Thanks to the writers of Grey's Anatomy for that.)
So, for those who are faithful believers in the Bible, whichever one they choose, there are options. Spelled out right there. They can be all judgey like Paul suggests in Corinthians, or, they can do as their Lord and Savior suggests and not judge others. Not cast the first stone. You know, basically, not be an ass. Not deny legal rights to people because you decided to go ahead and cast that stone, even though Jesus himself (as you believe, faithful Bible believer) told you NOT to do that. Like I tried to explain to someone tonight ... there are people who think that eating shellfish is wrong. Because it's in The Bible. (Yeah, it's in there. Also, stay away from pork and don't mix your meat and milk. And don't you dare touch a woman while she's on her period!) But if those people walk by and see someone eating crab? Or lobster? I seriously doubt they're going to walk by and start shouting Bible verses at you and telling you that you're going to hell. In fact, there weren't even any votes happening on it this year! That travesty, that no one is standing up to preserve the sanctity of the Kosher food rules. Seriously.
My opinion? People are just judgey. The same way that people didn't want integration in the 1960's. The same way men didn't want women to have the right to vote. The same way white people didn't want black people to be free. The same way the Europeans thought the Native Americans were savage. The same way the British wanted the Puritans the hell out of their country. See what I'm getting at here?
The worst part is that people hide behind the Bible and use it as their excuse for homophobia and hatred. Even though the argument doesn't hold water. Because if you want to take everything the Bible says and make it law, then women will have to throw out their pants. Any man missing a testicle won't be allowed into a church/mosque/synagogue. Children who misbehave will be stoned. Rape victims will have to marry their rapists. And my personal favorite, anyone who works on the Sabbath will be put to death. So don't even think of flipping on that light switch, sir, because it's after sundown on Friday evening.
My request to people who are anti-gay marriage? Man (or woman) up. Just say it. "I'm a homophobe!" I'll still think that you're ignorant and disrespectful, but I'll have more respect for you that people who filter their fear of the unknown through the Bible.
I think that my quarter-life crisis has (thankfully) come and gone. At 28, I feel secure in the decisions I've made for my life. But that doesn't mean I don't sometimes get a bit wishful about the things I could have or should have done.
I was watching one of those wedding shows last week. The ones where, of course, a well-off couple is planning a lavish to-do. Because, let's be honest, it's just not that much fun to watch a lower or middle class couple plan something on a shoestring budget. The planner enters a fabulous building in Manhattan to meet with the bride. Turns out, this is where the bride works. In an office bigger than the first floor of my house, with a fabulous view of the park. The bride can't be more than five years older than me, if that. She's rich and seemingly successful. What exactly does she do? It seems to be something creative. Whatever it is, every now and then I fancy myself with that level of success and wealth.
I could have been a writer. If discipline is something you could purchase and it had been something I could afford, I could have done it. That seems to be the thing that stands in my way. I imagine myself getting up at the crack of dawn (I'm a morning person in this fantasy) and opening my laptop at my dining room table while a fresh pot of coffee brews. (I also imaging living in a climate cool enough to allow for year round coffee drinking.) I could see myself having moderate success as a writer. A novelist? A blogger for one of my favorite liberal feminist sites? It could have been.
Sometimes, I wish I could have been a dancer. I was decent when I was younger and taking dance classes. Ballet was a favorite of mine, and if I could go back to being a child, I would likely demand a more strenuous ballet class. Year round. Maybe today I'd be living in a tiny closet of an apartment somewhere in New York, auditioning and making a livable but meager living dancing. Soon, I would plan to teach dancing full-time. After all, 28 is ancient in that world.
And in the most far-fetched of my fantasies, I imagine myself as a doctor. After all, there was that one week my freshman year of college when I considered going pre-med. Then I remembered how much I hated biology class when I was in high school, so I moved on. But still ... having the title "Doctor" before my name? Would be so very bad ass.
I'm having a lazy Sunday, in part because I've had a few nights of horrible sleep and I'm exhausted. This afternoon, I gathered up a stack of books that were taking up space under the bed, in my car, etc., and I went to Half-Price Books. Actually, most of the books I was taking to sell had been purchased there. We're talking fantastic titles like Ivy League Stripper and Pledged: The Secret Life of Sororities. (These are what I'd like to call "impulse buys".) I took the price tags off of a few of the books. One had been $7.98, another was $6.95. And since I had about 10 books, I was thinking Sweet, I can get a few new books for the plane. (I'm going on vacation soon, and long flights require good reads.)
I've never sold any books to a bookstore, unless the college experience counts. You know, where you buy a book for $250, use it for one semester, and then attempt to sell it back only to hear that a new edition just came out and that they'll give you a whole $2.50 for it. Awesome.
I digress. . .
So I walk into the bookstore, stack of books in hand, and go up to the buy-back counter. There was an employee standing there, with his back to me. Typically, the employees are behind the counter. But whatever. I finally put the books on the floor, as holding them was less than thrilling. As soon as I did that, he turned to me and mumbled something. Quite honestly, I wasn't even positive that he was speaking to me. I did the "huh?" head tilt, and said, "Excuse me?" He said, only a little more clearly, "Driver's license." I was thinking to myself, why yes, the State of Texas has bestowed one of those upon me, thanks for inquiring. Seriously, the guy was FULL OF JOY. He told me to stay in the store, and that was that. I looked at the stack of books on the floor and went, "Um. Okay?"
Here's the thing. . . If you're going to work in customer service, throw on a smile every now and then. Enunciate. You can do it! Maybe you're having a craptastic day. That's alright, we all have those. You could still pretend that you don't hate me. It might hurt for a second, but I promise the sting will fade.
By the way, for those 10 books, I got a whopping $5.00. I kid you not. Half-Price Books is making a killing. And if you're wondering what I got for my trip-to-NYC-plane-ride, that would be City of Ashes by Cassandra Clare.
USA Today has posed the question, “Is college worth it?” Do you get any sort of bang for your buck? The reality is that we’re in the middle of a recession making jobs harder to come by (good paying jobs seem like a myth at this point), and college costs are higher than ever. (Seriously, $200 for a book? Who are those publishers kidding?) I think it depends on what your goal is. What are you looking to gain from the experience?
I always knew that I would go to college. I started sending information requests to schools when I was in the 5th grade. I don’t think I had mastered the cursive letter “q” at that point, but I knew what my dream schools were: New York University, Harvard, and The University of Texas, otherwise known as Too Expensive, Way Too Expensive, and Just Out of Reach.
In the end, I enrolled at the economical Stephen F. Austin State University. Two hours from home, in the oldest (and what I swore was the smallest) town in Texas. When I graduated four years later with my Bachelor of Arts degree in Communication, I owed just over $18,000 in student loans. That’s just a tiny bit below the average of $23,000, so I suppose I did get a bargain. For that low, low cost, I had two initials after my name (which were VERY important to me), a piece of paper declaring my competence to the world, and 4 years of life experience that I wouldn’t have gotten any other way.
While I was in college, I learned that they aren’t kidding when they say “violators will be towed”. I learned that some professors, like regular people, are cantankerous asses who can’t be swayed towards kindness. I also learned that some people, including some professors, are truly kind and want nothing more than to help you become the best person you can be. I learned that there will always be one person who you absolutely can’t stand, and that you’ve always got the option to not deal with that person.
I also learned about philosophy, astronomy, Greek mythology, world history, and how to white balance a camera (which has never been needed in my real life). I remember some of the Spanish that I learned, and most of the grammar rules that cantankerous professor I had for journalism taught us. But the most important things I learned didn’t happen in the classroom, per se. I learned that life has consequences, and that when you don’t get your work done on time, there are repercussions. When you don’t pay attention, you miss out on important things. I learned how to be an adult. That’s what college taught me.
Was it worth all of the money spent? The late nights studying and the times when I worked multiple jobs to pay for it? The stress of trying to get good grades and make friends when I was a broke liberal on a campus full of well-to-do conservative Christians?
Yeah, it was. I always say that I wish I had a different experience. I would have loved to have gotten to go to my dream school of NYU. To study at Tisch, surrounded by like-minded people and creativity and city lights. I would have loved that. But I can’t say that the experience that I got wasn’t worth it. Going to college isn’t about leaving and collecting a fat paycheck (not that it wouldn’t be a nice perk). It’s about becoming who you’re meant to be, learning about more than the world you already know. And it was worth every penny.
By 1p.m. today, I had finished reading a book, stopped at the library to find another, taken a pilates class, and made a stop at the grocery store (where I managed to purchase diet soda and three types of ice cream ONLY). That's a productive Saturday morning. I usually don't get up before noon.
Being at the gym on a weekend is a new one for me. I think of working out as a chore. It's something to be relegated to weekdays, along with working, cleaning, and other unsavory tasks. Weekends are for lounging, napping, and doing as little as possible. Twisting myself into a pretzel (AND HOLD. Does it hurt yet? Yes? Good, KEEP HOLDING!) usually isn't on my list of relaxing activities. But since I was up and couldn't fall back asleep (and dammit, I tried), off to pilates I went.
Within the first minute of the warm-up, I got a cramp in my leg. And we're not talking a little, mild ache. We're talking HOLY SHIT MY HAMSTRING IS REVOLTING. But I'm in a full pilates class. I can't be the one who punks out during the warm-up. I'm lame... but not THAT lame. So I keep going. For the most part, it was a pretty laid back class. The instructor, who looked like she could be a soap star (no offense), was a big fan of resting between exercises. And what do you know? So am I! See? Things were going great.
Until she told us she we were going to draw little circles. My first thought was Um, is this art class? Then she told us to stick both of our legs up in the air. Nope, not art class. So there I am, laying on my back, both legs up in the air, drawing little (imaginary) circles with my toes, then my heels, back to the toes, and again with the heels and HEY LADY DID YOU FORGET ABOUT US? MY ABS CAN'T TAKE THESE CIRCLES ANYMORE! Sheesh. You'd think drawing little circles with your feet in the air would be easier, but I promise you, it's not.
The plus side to my productive morning? I came home, had an ice cream sandwich, and took a nap.
